Thoughts on Christian Marriage

The writings concerning Christian marriage are largely citations from a letter our pastor wrote to a close friend.

We collate these selections for Christian couples as well as aspiring couples to remind them anew of the character of a Christian wedlock.

There is barely any institution that can be of a more effectual forum to glorify God than a Christian marriage. However the tragedy is that this very institution has been prolifically employed in a careless and impetuous manner to wrought untold damage to the name of Christ.

It is our ardent prayer that God and the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ will use this simple tract to be a real blessing to many a households and wedlock.

Marriage and Faith

“Marriage is an institution ordained by God Himself in the days of our primeval parents to ratify the most intimate relationship between a man and a woman. Its foundation and blessedness lies in the union and relationship of each of the spouse to the Lord Himself. To endure, marriage ties ought to defy sundry and divers difficulties that may be generated along the course of time.

But our personal faith with the Lord Jesus Christ must of necessity be real, vital and experimental. To be presumptuous of the matter concerning our salvation will not only prove to be eternally disastrous in the after-life, but would emasculate the strength of conjugal union and make our living a terrible misery.”

The Simplicity of the Solemnization

“While we think that a marriage solemnization should be marked with a sense of decorum and propriety, we are persuaded that the concept that is practised by most churches, including yours, is not Scripturally tenable. Solemnization should never be a liturgical service. Solemnization is a public (secular) and legal matter to be undertaken outside the church; hence it is not to be performed as a ceremony in the midst of the church.

The fact remains that there is no Scriptural authority for such a drill.

The concept that is practised in Christendom bears much resemblance to Roman Catholic Church’s sacrament of marriage. Granted that at the time when they are about to embark on their wedlock, the Christian couple should be instructed, exhorted and prayed for by the Church; but this must not be confused with the exchange of rings, the procedural utterances, the wearing of specific bridal costumes, a certain kind of arranged entrances for the couple and such kind of customs which are nothing but vestiges of Papacy. Surely these things constitute a formality and when this formality is accomplished within the sober ambience of a congregational assembly it characterises a ceremony. Unfortunately I reiterate there is no Scriptural basis for it. What ought to have been a simple, God-fearing and Christ-honouring activity has been obscured and confused by unwarranted procedures.”

A Successful Marriage

“I would to God that your marriage be one that will afford pre-eminence to Christ. Solemnization is only the beginning of marriage which is a life-long thing.

When we consider the prospect of a successful marriage, it is preposterous to confine it to the undertaking of the solemnization alone. To say the least, this is a crass heathen mentality.”

A Calling to Discharge Duties

“Marriage is to be seen as a calling to faithfully discharge duties, obligations and responsibilities mutually one to another, together to the family (of which the marriage is the foundation) and together to the church and the world at large. Truly it is a grave and protracted calling that requires stamina, patience, sympathy, understanding, forbearance and fortitude to weather difficulties, conflicts in temperaments, stress and temptations.”

Benefits and Blessings

“Withal marriage is a refuge and a shelter.

This can only happen when there is mutual care, compassion and support.

It is therefore needful that both of you be able to garner the love of Christ through the Spirit shed abroad in your hearts.”

An Altar of Worship

“Above all, Christian marriage is an altar wherein family worship is offered to the Blessed and Eternal God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Let there be discipline, sacrifice and purposefulness to seriously and regularly maintain this privilege. Be apprehensive about your propensity to neglect this vital aspect; strive stedfastly to suffer all things to cherish and practise this precious undertaking.

Every family is a miniature church.

But, O what becomes a household when the worship of God is relegated from the central activity to a peripheral thing?”

Spiritual Equality and Administrative Hierarchy

“It will do well for you and your wife to remember the cardinal principles of an enduring wedlock.

While the doctrines of the common priesthood of all believers ensure equal spiritual status for both husband and wife before God, yet God has made it unequivocal that in terms of administrative hierarchy, the husband is the head and therefore should govern the household. However his headship can only be effective if the wife is willing to submit gladly.

When both partners do their part, the husband in ruling and the wife in submitting, it will bring untold blessings to the wedlock thereof.

The rule is absolute except when sin is involved. Break this rule and the deluge of the devil will surge in violently to make a mess of the marriage.”

Marriage: A Process by Faith in Christ Jesus

“Marriage is a demanding challenge.

God’s grace is obviously sufficient but it is not without much waiting upon God before we can actually harness it. Sweat, tears and blood may characterise the building up of a God-fearing home but it is to be looked upon as a worthwhile endeavour in retrospection when God’s favour and blessings are in it.

In the words of the wise man:“Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches” (Proverbs 24:3,4).

Marriage is a God appointed institution pre-eminently meant to glorify Him.

In Christ Jesus, this is a tremendous possibility.

When consecrated couples are joined in wedlock by faith in God through Christ Jesus, they bring to pass this possibility when both spouses continue to live by faith in God. Their consecration to God must be manifested by a life of constant obedience to the Word of God and unceasing communion with the Three Persons of the Blessed Godhead, even the Father, the Lord Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.”

Marriage and the Times

“It helps when you remember that this is a wicked and perverse generation when apostasy do reign devastatingly even in the churches and Christian households.

We remember the words of warning from our Lord: “And as it was in the days of Noe, so shall it be also in the days of the Son of man. They did eat, they drank, they married wives, they were given in marriage, until the day that Noe entered into the ark, and the flood came, and destroyed them all” (Luke 17:26,27):

When only lip-service is paid to the love for the Lord Jesus Christ, when the experience of God’s graciousness is something that is alien to one’s personal life and when the exercise of repentance is superficial and rare, then it is not difficult to prove that those who bear these characteristics are actually employing marriage as a provision to satisfy their self-love.

For such, no matter how splendid a marriage may be at the outset, the ravages of time will prove marriage a prison-house wherein there is no escape.”